My Life is a Joke

6 12 2010

*I spent 3 or more years turning my car off every time I came to a complete stop because the transmission refused to shift into second gear only to find out that it was something that could be fixed for a few hundred dollars…my life is a joke.

*I found out that once I finally fixed the transmission, the spark plugs and brakes need to be replaced for $500 meaning that now that my car will actually drive above 30 mph I cannot stop the damn thing…my life is a joke.

*I am finally healing over the death of my grandfather five years ago only to find out that my aunt is dying of advanced metastatic cancer while another aunt (my stepmom’s sister) is also fighting advanced cancer meaning that I am once again facing death of loved ones at the holidays…my life is a joke.

*I tried to unplug a DVD player next to the Grode’s Christmas tree and the tree FELL ON TOP OF ME because they only put the branches on the front half of the tree and the tree was incredibly off balance…now the lights at the top don’t work and the top is crooked as hell…because it fell on me…and I broke its fall…my life is a joke.

*My besties are getting engaged, getting new jobs, having babies, buying houses, moving on in their lives and I am stuck in SuFu going nowhere soon and I feel like I am reverting to childhood because the Grodes treat me like a child…my life is a joke.

*I desperately want to move to the next step in my relationship (because let’s face it I have been dating this fool forever for almost 6 years) but the boy refuses to get an apartment with me, get a house with me, get a job, get engaged…blah…but somehow I have to go celebrate other peoples’ advancements at 11 weddings next year…my life is a joke.

*I truly believe that I am allergic to alcohol…my life is a joke.

*2 years ago I was a size zero…and now I am definitely NOT a size zero…but my friends keep losing weight post college…my life is a joke.

*I feel like I am losing touch, losing perspective, losing hope, losing energy…just losing. Does this make me a loser lol…no, but my life IS a joke. Pity party over…tomorrow is a brand new day…hopefully filled with fewer things that make my life one big legendary fail.




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