Baffled

27 04 2010

I am utterly baffled.

I received a confusing email and I don’t know what to do about it…someone who once meant a lot to me contacted me after 7 years of not talking or seeing each other and I am conflicted as to whether to reply or not.

On one hand, a reply would possibly open Pandora’s box and reopen old feelings and memories (as the original email has already accomplished) for me because I have successfully not thought about this person for years. It could also provide closure if we could be friends after all these years (but is that ever really possible with an ex, especially one that means/meant a lot to you?) or even talk peacefully since our break up was not the most amicable. It could anger someone who currently cares about me or appear to be a test…or he could completely ignore it (not likely), in which case I would be saddened that he didn’t care enough to be jealous? It’s a complex situation and I don’t know why this person is contacting me after all these years.

So…do I leave the past in the past? Am I reading into this email too much and it’s just a harmless communication and it wouldn’t be an issue to reply and reopen the lines of communication? Is this something that I should leave behind and just consider it the past?

Part of me is really curious as to what he has to say and why he’s contacting me after all these years (he somehow remembered my email address after 7 years!) but part of me doesn’t want to take a step backwards…

Any suggestions would be appreciated as I sit here and worry about what to do. I have talked to 4 people and the women unanimously voted to reply to the email while the men said absolutely not, leave it in the past. What to do?

Until I figure this out…it remains in the inbox like a heavy weight around my ankles that I drag around day after day….what could he have to say after 7 years?

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