Touching the Edge of Her Skin

2 04 2010

Part of a Blue October lyric that I really like (You Make Me Smile) and fitting for today’s thoughts when I feel as if I am peeling my skin off in strips. I feel like there are a million cracks in my surface and I am embracing it because I have come to recognize that it’s not healthy to try to pretend that everything is ok all the time and that it’s ok and sane and healthy and normal to embrace that hysterical “falling apart” feeling that women get sometimes…you know the one.

Sometimes life takes us on a different path than we had anticipated and we are whisked away from the path and future on which we had set our sights. This is ok. It’s ok to be disconcerted and bewildered and lost for a moment because that is acknowledgement of the fact that Someone else has a plan for us and we really don’t have too much control over that fact…

My life has taken a different path today and I can’t really talk about it here but I thank you all for your discretion and respect for my decision not to write about it. One of the sweet things is knowing that there are tons of readers in the blog community that always have your back when you feel like you’re falling…they’ll be there to soften the landing with their kind words and support, and for that, I thank you.

For tonight, I am going to read Breaking Dawn, listen to alternative indie music and bliss out…maybe have some Sparks on the porch with D and try to keep the edges of my skin from splitting apart further.

And for all of you…I wish you a beautiful blissful Easter Sunday and I hope that if the edges of your skin are slipping apart…that you have someone there to help you gather them together at the end of the day. If not…come to me and I’ll be your proverbial and unjudging shoulder upon which to cry.

Apple River Smoky Doogs 2006 Because sometimes you need the smoke to clear and to see the light at the end of that tunnel…and if not…you need a really great friend with a flashlight.




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